It’s Showtime! – Swizzy’s at it again!

Well well well… what do we have here??? So, rumor has it (and by rumor has it, I mean that some random chick wrote a whole article like she was a roving reporter and what not) that this chick named Christina Elizabeth claims that she was Swizz Beaks Beatz mistress (AND again by mistress, I mean jumpoff) while he was married to Mashonda AND Alicia Keys!!! Now, this is where I would normally add all types of dramatic effects by falling to the floor (#faintflow) while holding my imaginary church hat and clutching  the imaginary pearls on my chest while shouting “SAY IT AINT SO, LAWD!!!! THE DEVIL IS BUSY!!!!” right in front of my cubicle at work… BUUUUTTTT since I saw this coming from 2,963 miles away (how far is overseas where his OTHER mistress/jumpoff/babymother is???)  I will just do my blank stare… right about… Now

O_O

Anywaydoe, this is what the jezebel Chris had to say about her time with Squidward Swizz:

I’m only making this statement because I’m being put out there as a liar and I am very embarrassed. I would like to confirm that the rumor about Swizz Beatz cheating on Mashonda with me is absolutely true. I would also like to confirm that the rumors about Swizz “sexting” me, even in his present marriage, are absolutely true. I am also confirming that I lost my cell phone and someone else posted all the stuff that you see on the internet.

I’ve known Kasseem since 2007. We met at Solange Knowles’ (whom I do not associate with) birthday party in Houston, TX. A gentleman from Kasseem’s entourage approached me and said that someone wanted to talk to me. After I asked who it was, he pointed at Kasseem. I knew he was “Swizz Beatz”, but I did not know anything else about him. I gave him my phone number and he called me right away and invited me to eat at Katz’ Deli on Montrose Blvd. The next morning, he invited me to accompany him at Radio One (979 The Box) for his interview. Afterwards, we went back to his hotel room but we DID NOT HAVE SEX. A couple of hours later, he had to leave so he could catch his flight. He hugged and kissed me in public as if he were a single man.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks later. He invited me out to Miami with him and I gladly accepted. I met him in Dallas and we flew to Miami together. My last minute ticket placed me in coach and his ticket placed him in first class, but he switched his first class seat with the guy sitting next to me so he could sit next to me. In Miami, we stayed at his friends beautiful home. This is where we became sexually active and this is where I found out he was married. He snuck me through the house and it was all odd to me until I found a gift with Mashonda & Kasseem’s name on it. I asked him later on why he was cheating on her and he basically said she wasn’t being the wife he needed. He also said that if she asked if he was cheating, he would not lie to her, but he wouldn’t come right out and tell her.

After that trip, he invited me to meet him in Philly. I was picked up from the airport and taken to a club where he was performing at. Him and his crew jumped in the truck and we drove to VA from there. In VA, we got on a tour bus and drove to multiple destinations. After that, I flew back to Miami, he got sick and I got stranded in the Miami airport overnight. I flew back home to Houston the next day.

Later that week, he went on an overseas trip with Mashonda. I received a call from him saying “My wife is about to call you. Tell her nothing happened.” When Mashonda called me, this is exactly what I did. He did not contact me after that. They got a divorce and although we stayed in contact afterwards, there was nothing too drastic. I’m guessing this is when he was dating Alicia. Recently, we’ve been contacting each other (as you’ve all seen), but I haven’t physically seen him. We were making plans to, but I had to work and I wasn’t going to take off work to go see him. I live on my own, I have responsibilities and I strongly believe that if you are not contributing to those responsibilities, there is no reason for me to neglect them to entertain you. I am a very independent individual and the people who know me will tell you that I would never hold my hand out and ask for anything and if I do, I have a very hard time doing it.

Even though Swizz offered and offered and offered to buy me things, the only thing I accepted was plane tickets to go see him. He’s a wonderful man and I had a great time with him as well as a great relationship. Of course he’ll deny the whole thing and of course Alicia will stand up for her man. It’s understood.

Chris

*AND SCENE*   

So, after Trollop Trixie was done with the WAAKAA WAAKAA WAAKAA, Alicia took her balls out her smedium pants to Twitter to say:

“Haaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! Some things are just LAUGHABLE!!!!!! Now, Let’s Continue to SHINE!! Everything else is a waste of time!! Sending love!”

Really!?!?!?! *Jesus take the wheel*

AND THEN Swizz squawked Tweeted:

 “Wow people sure do take things far with the BS Lmao!”

Really!?!?! Again!?!?!  *and hold my mule*

OOH OHH and also, it looks like soon as this came out that Swizz just so happened to buy his WIFE a CAR for HIS birthday… wait what!?!?! Didn’t Kobe do something like that… but with a canary yellow diamond ring??? #boybye

Well since what I think is important to y’all (Shut Up!!! *Lil Richard voice*), IF this is true *perched lips to cheeks* and Swizz did in fact cheat on Alicia Keys, where will the surprise in this be??? NO, REALLY!?!?! If he cheated WITH you, why wouldn’t he cheat ON you!?!?!? Ok, I’ll leave it alone cuz I am a child of HE and bestiality IS a sin!!!!

AND I’M OUT – Jai

Jay-Z & Beyonce Sitting In A Tree…

With all the awesome news that has been circulating on the World Wide Web about my favorite hood couple George and Weezie Jay-Z and Beyonce announcing they’re expecting a gut full of millionaire human and it should pop pop off sometime around March, I’m SOOOOO excited for them!!! AND so I’ve decided to make my very own Wish (but really HOPE) List for my new bestie: Little Baby Hov of the Creole Heavens and the Brooklyn Basements, Bey-Z!!!

1. I hope that the baby looks like Beyonce… OR at least like the lead monkey, Caesar, from Rise of the Planet of the Apes (cuz he was darling!)
2. I hope that the baby is NOT forced to wear Dereon or Roc-A-Wear… EVER!!!
3. I hope the baby doesn’t have to spend too much time with Auntie Kanye… cuz he can be a bit… hmmm… uhhhh… PASSIONATE at times! (and by passionate, I mean dramatic and emotional!)
4. I hope the baby has a cute name like: Shawn-yonce Kelly Bleek Dash Destiny’s Roc Nation Beans Latavia Jesus Knowles Carter… The 1^st! (unless that name is already taken… then we can name the baby Otis)
5. I hope the baby have to spend too much time with Auntie Solange either… cuz she can be a bit… hmmm… uhhhh… PASSIONATE at times! (and AGAIN by passionate, I mean dramatic and emotional!)
6. I hope that Matthew Joe Jackson Knowles doesn’t try to bring his bastard baby around thinking it can play with “OUR” baby… cuz this baby right here is ROYALTY!!!! King Baby Bey-Z!!!!  *his dumb azz baby!!!*
7. I hope Ms. Tina doesn’t try to be the baby’s stylist and dress it with all that dumb sequins and shyt she used to dress Destiny’s Child with!!!
8. I hope the baby’s hair is layed like sweet, blond Malaysian Remi baby hair that has been lightly feathered with a Crest toothbrush and smells like Ace of Spades champagne!
9. I hope the baby likes fancy eating establishments such as Red Lobster and Outback Steakhouse!
10. AND finally, as the baby’s elder sister (I’m just waiting to Jay and Bey – I mean, Dad and Mom to finish up my adoption paperwork then I’m In There Like Swimwear!!!) I’ll make sure that he/she/it has all the numbers of people to contact in case of TRUE emergency situations such as: the butlers, the maids, the nannies, the cleaning crew, the lawn man, the pool boy, Mom’s glam squad, Dad’s Yankee fitted company, the chef, the personal trainer, the choreographer AND Michelle cuz it doesn’t look like she’d doing anything with Kelly and Bey being so successful right now!!!

Ok y’all, I gotta go cuz I’m on my way to Target to get my new unborn brother/sister some Luvs diapers, some onsies and a case of Smirnoff Ice!

And I’m Out – Jai

Been Gone For A Minute… Now I’m Back With The Jumpoff!

  <— BBM Pose…. Rhinostyle!

YES HUNTY!!!! As I patiently wait for the fukery that is the Sidehorned Satan, Eric Williams and the Basketball Flies Wives Reunion next week so I can tear them ALL TO PIECES right on this very blogsite, I figured I’d give you one of my favorite things… And since my hair is about to be layed like that too cute hood bat Evelyn Lozada once I finish my new spanish wavy 18 inch indian remi in a 1B/30 sew in weave, it was only fitting that I share my new boo with you:

AND I’M OUT- Jai

Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself…

As I continue my journey to praise the GREATNESS that is Verdine White of Earth, Wind and Fire, I say to y’all WATUP Fisheyed Fools! I know its been too long and y’all miss me… or whatever! Because so many people have been yelling at me for my neglect of this beautifully Zenful and Serene place I call A Starr’s State of Mind, I just wanted to let y’all know that I’m still working on some blog things (and possible revamps) and will be back soon but in the meantime and in between time, I wanted to give y’all a lil taste of AWESOMENESS to hold you over til I come back.

AND so in the name of the Honey Sweetened King of Sequins Body Suits and 20 inch Malaysian Remi #30, here you go:

AND I’M OUT  – Jai

Ices Brown Shuts The Game DOWN!

PLEASE say something Ci Ci!!!! Oh, you shook huh??? Yeah, I thought this would shut you down AND shut you up!!!!

See, my girl Ices Brown is an artist and she’s sensitive about her shyt! She is also stuntin’ on these hoes that wanna grind all about the stage (you know, the usual suspects: Ciara, Keri, Rihanna etc…) OH and please believe that there’s more where that came from! She sings as well and even tho she never seems to know the words to the songs, her angelic voice is a mixture between Fergie and Jesus…  so respect her gangsta!

Here’s one more for the road as she breaks it down for the grown and sexy!!! OWWWWW!!!!

AND I’M OUT- Jai

Funk Flex VS. Charlemagne… It’s About To Be A BARN BURNAH!!!!

WHOA LAWD!!!!! Help me Jesus… help me Tom Cruise!!!! *in my Jay-Z voice* It’s… about… to go… DOWN!!!! Well what have I tripped and bruised my knee upon? It looks like Resident Stunt Queen and Pain in My Azz, Hot 97’s Funk Master Flex, has gotten himself in a radio war of words with Power 105’s Charlemagne tha God and the whole Breakfast Club over Mr. Cee’s tranny shenanigans! *read yesterdays post for details*

Hehehehehe *giggles of excitement and delight* So last night Flunk Flex got on his radio show with his thongs in his azz and made the following statement after The Breakfast Club made fun of Mr. Cee and his tranny trickin’:

“New York City, I see everything moving and I see everybody moving,” Flex said during his Monday (April 4) night Hot 97 broadcast. “We don’t discriminate against no one or anybody. Whatever is your preference out here New York City, we do not discriminate. Because I need to say that before I say what I’m gonna say. Understand, the rumors that you hear about my man Mister Cee are untrue. OK? Let’s address that first but we do not discriminate on what anybody wants to do…Now you listen to me right now so you understand clearly. New York City, I’m gonna say something today that I ain’t never said. I know over there in that building, greasy talk huh, let me explain something to you right now. I’ll lose a friendship today. I know everything that moves in that building…You want to throw a stone this morning? Is that what it is? … All of y’all over there know exactly what I’m talking about. I will lose that friendship because I stand next to this logo! I stand next to this logo and nothing tears it down!”

S/N: GURL STOP!!!! Funkasaurus Rex it too much but it’s even funnier if you listen to it so here you go:

Ok so THEN, Charlemagne came back this morning with the following while naming Punk Master Flex as the “Donkey of the day”:

“Now yesterday we reported on Mister Cee being caught with a transvestite, we found out this morning via The [New York] Post and Daily News that he’s been arrested twice before for loitering for the purpose of prostitution. Mister Cee is Funkmaster Flex’s friend so Flex decided to stand up for Mister Cee last night,” Charlamagne told morning listeners. “You sound like an old a** wrestler. ‘Whatcha gonna do, when Funkmaster Flex runs wild on you!’ You the big bad wolf in the city, huh? You like to huff and puff and blow houses down. Let’s be clear. You can huff and puff but the only thing getting blown down is Mister Cee by transsexuals. That is the fact of the matter. Why you mad at us because your man Mister Cee likes getting it on with transsexuals? I’m confused here. He got arrested for being with a transsexual last week, he got busted in October and November for loitering for the purpose of prostitution. Don’t get mad at us, get mad at him,” Char added. “Tell him, ‘Homie, I don’t care if you like men, but move better. Don’t get a prostitute, get a boyfriend. You’re out here making yourself and the brand look crazy.’ It’s OK if he’s gay but give him some brotherly advice and tell him to move a little better with it…Subliminals are so 90’s. But I understand because you a 1990’s type of guy. That’s your era.”

*Click link below to hear The Breakfast Club’s response cuz for whatever reason I’m not bright enough to know how to post that one… but whatever!:

http://www.power1051fm.com/common/kyte/medialink.php?uri=channels/449330/1265008

This is the FUNNIST DAY EVA!!!! Now I’ma NEED to hear how Fluff Master Flex comes back on this one here cuz they really had some valid points and while I was crying laughing, I have a feeling Skunk Master Flesh is somewhere just crying…

AND I’M OUT- Jai

Mr. Cee…. Did WHAT!?!?!?!

Well well well… as The Notorious B.I.G. is turning right in his grave (and his roaming eye is turning left), the hip hop world was shaking and stirred by the tragic news that one of it’s pioneers, DJ Mr Cee, was arrested over the weekend. Now, it wasn’t the arrest itself that caused all this commotion (cuz who doesn’t get locked up in hip hop) but the cause of the arrest that has everyone’s boxers in a bunch! See, Mr. Cee was arrested and charged with “Lewd Conduct” or as I like to call it: “Acting A Donkey And Showing You’re A$$ In The Streets Where The Po Po Can See You, Dummy”. So, here is what was reported:

 Hot 97 Deejay Calvin “Mister Cee” Laburn (executive producer of the Notorious B.I.G.’S debut album “Ready to Die”) was busted by NYPD cops before being hauled off to jail and charged with lewd conduct. It happened this past Wednesday at about 5:00 p.m. That’s when cops approached a parked car and caught Mister Cee in the act of receiving fellatio from a man inside the vehicle. The 44-year-old music man was booked at Manhattan’s 1st Precinct, located at West Street and Watts Street.

Now since this story came out, many have come to the defense of Mr. Cee including Radio personality (and thorn in my side), Funk Master Flex who opened his n*%#a lips way too soon obviously made this statement:

“Earlier this evening, a rumor went viral through multiple social media platforms stating that Mr. Cee was arrested for committing a lewd act. Please be advised this rumor is not true. Stating false allegations about somebody and presenting it as valid information is unethical. Please continue to listen to Mr. Cee everyday at noon Monday through Friday on Hot 97 and Hot97.com.”

It has since been confirmed through official police documents that Funky Flex is a a$$ and a dummy the allegations are indeed true. It has also been reported that Mr. Cee is known for paying female strippers to urinate on him

Now, I’m not judging him but I have some concerns. First, why are you paying people to pee on you when I’m sure many will do it for free? Cuz shyt, I’ve pee’d on folks for a breakfast sandwich from the corner deli and a Lipton iced tea and I would’ve surely helped him out if need be… but whatever! NEXT, I’m thinking Mr. Cee is blind cuz have y’all seen Ugg Mugg up top the page!?!?!? I’ve seen way cuter gays AND prostitutes that would’ve easily tea bagged him AND licked his nacho (nacho butt and nacho balls for the peeps that didn’t know) with butter or a lite french dressing in the comfort of their own cars off in the country somewhere… but maybe gorillas in the wild are his “thing” so let me stay outta his bizness!!!!

I’m tempted to see what story his boo, Funk Flexible will come up with now but I’m toooo thru! And at Mr. Cee…. DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!!

AND I’M OUT- Jai

 

Hip Hop HOE-ray!

Ok ya’ll, since 10:30pm is WAY past my bedtime, I just got the chance last night (since it came back on at 8pm, which is more my speed #elderlyflow) to watch “Love & Hip Hop” or as I just named it in my head “Is I’ma Marry A Rapper, Mama??? Cuz I REALLY Wanna!!!” Anywaydoe, as much as these reality shows and the flamingos on them normally get on the last nerve that I saved to hold my patience with, these chicks aren’t so bad to me…. YET!

Chrissy – MY B*TCH!!!!! Well she’s actually the rapper Jim Jones’ b*tch but ya’ll get the gist! Anywhoo, she has quickly stolen a special place in my heart because she’s not playing with Jimmy NOR any of these hoes boxing in bikinis and wearing sequins superhero pajamas! I think Chrissy is gorgeous but it’s obvious that she and Jim are about as old as Bill Cosby and Camille… well and Jesus so she aint got the time to be playing with folks!!!! I know THAT’S right cuz I’ll fuk a trick up over turkey, egg and cheese on a wheat bagel if she look suspicious!!!! Now, Jim seems to love her, I can tell that but he’s an old pimp… no, like a MAD, DUMB, CRAZY OLD PIMP so I’m sure when he’s done wearing cornrows, smedium fitted shirts and saggy jeggings with spongebob boxers that he’ll come around and propose! Awwwww, old love is grand *sigh and swoon*

Olivia – The G-NOT broad that got dropped cuz “ALLEGEDLY” she missed the memo on company letterhead from the CEO that clearly stated “It aint no fun if the homies cant have none” so BOOP *swift kick*… well that’s what I heard! Anywayzzz, so she claimed in this episode to have been dating football player Darrelle Revis of the New York Jets… butterrummmm….. from what I’ve been hearing, he begs to differ sooooo…. Moving right along, I think Olivia is very pretty too but she talks like a n*gga from Brooklyn after smoking a blunt laced with coke so I’ma need for her to fem up a bit cuz I wont be surprised if she starts grabbing her balls on stage!!! #dudelookslikealady

Somaya – speaking of dudes, She is an “ALLEGED” rapper and if memory serves me correctly, she’s also the ex of Joe Budden #notreallyimportantorrelevant . Since she just up and left L.A. to N.Y. to follow her dreams of looking like a drag queen, it looks like she’ll be living in an asbestos cave on a queen mattress until she gets her hustle off the ground. I can’t knock it… but it sure seems like Chrissy wanted to knock her out and that was mad hilarious to me!!! Somaya is a lil messy and manish but it seems like she’s just tryna make it… so You Go, Sir! *thumbs up*

Emily – The rapper Fabolous’ wife… girl… baby mother… stylist! She seems rather distraught that Fab is not claiming her to the public after 8 years together. Now I would be the one to think since Fab looks like a saber chipped tooth turtle sans the shell that he would be more than happy to claim ANYONE/THING that’s claiming him… but I guess I’m wrong #kanyeshrug…. AND I don’t blame Fab either cuz if this chick let this go on for EIGHT YEARS then why should he stop now!?!?!?! I’ll wait….  What Emily needs to do is borrow Olivia’s balls and shut shyt down!!!! Like go to a Fabolous concert, politely walk pass the security and on to the stage while he’s perform “You Be Killing ‘Em” and then start kicking mics and turntables off the stage Whitney Houston style!!! I can’t give any better advice if I was giving it to myself! In the meantime, stay on your job and style Fab with ONE good,  new tooth!

Mashonda – is Swizz Beats ex wife and it doesn’t seem like to me that she will be a permanent fixture on the show especially since she can’t even mention his name on it but and we pretty much know all her business anyway (and I mean ALL) so aint much more for her to say now that everything died down and is boring with her and Mr. Keys (an by MR I mean Alicia) but I’ll keep a side eye on her tho in case something pop pops off!!!

Here’s to hoping that these pretty peacocks don’t turn into pigeons cuz I mean, they’re still birds nonetheless but they’re the ones you enjoy watching and not the ones you wanna kick the shyt out of when you’re sitting in the park!

AND I’M OUT- Jai

Bobbi Kristina – Saddown Somewhere, Cokie!!!!

OOOHHHHH LAWD!!!! My blood pressure is too high and over it’s limit I’m sure AND I’m fired up, ya’ll!!!! And its all cuz of that got damn Bobbi Kristina CocainENA Houston Brown!!!! You know, it’s always amazing to me when folks turn to THE LORD and start quoting scriptures once they get caught out there with their druggie shenanigans and doing hoodrat stuff with their friends!!!! #hoesaddowninthenameofthelord

Anywaydoe, as you may have heard by now and can clearly see above, 17 year old Bobbi Kris was caught out there looking like a hoe pro SHEEN’N (HA! Shouts to my boo Charlie Sheen) and snorting that nose candy on film! She THEN took to Twitter to spew lies from her n*gga lips give the following statement and obviously set the story straight… or whatever:

 

“The pictures_ a former very dear person to me did this. Set me up to make it look exactly what it looks like. God will smite them yes..But it’s really not what it looks like.. People will do anything for money which is extremely sad, and I’m very hurt by this.Thing’s people do these days to hurt others is a shame. All I can do now, is keep my head up high, keep looking towards the lord.All the lord is telling me is be still. That’s all, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. #BeStill”

 

O_O *hit my head on my desk keyboard… oozing tiger blood*

 

“I love my family so much. My mom just comforted me to the max, and I’m so thankful for her. Thank you so much lord for blessing me with an Phenomenal family and incredibly phenomenal mother. Thank you for giving me the strength to move forward and put things in the past.”

 

O_O *trying to reach my desk phone with my Adonis powers to call 911*

 

“And the person that did this was a result of a horrible relationship that went sour. I was in love_ he was in love with money. I’ve learned My lesson. I’m so much greater and blessed for it today, and I believe nothing less. That is the last I will speak of this, let’s praise god And be greatful and thankful for your family, and people that truly love you, strength, courage, and life lessons learned. GodblessUall «3”

 

O_O *staring into space as I drift into a peaceful journey. My tombstone will read Something.com*

What… In… The… Bobby… Brown… Coked… Lip… Hell… Are… You… Talking… About… Hoe!?!?!?! You’re looking and sounding like your cokehead daddy… mama…. parents right about now!!!! I don’t like teenagers and I really don’t like you!!! See, at the beginning of the week I was WINNING with Charlie Sheen, minding my B.I. then here you come with your bratty azz antics and coke whoring it up! THEN you wanna invite sweet lil drugfree baby Jesus to your crackhouse??? OH HELL TO DA NAW!!!!!

*sigh*

Now ok, I shouldn’t give her a hard time cuz it was probably inevitable since her moms and pops are the King and Queen of R&B (rocks and booze) and it was only a matter of time before she started poosay popping on a hand stand and making it clap for a bag of Sour Patch Kids, some bottles of Ciroc and that Blue Magic!!! Hell, I’m sure her great cousin Dionne Warwick saw this coming all the way back when she was on the Psychic Hotline!!! WHOA Jesus be the glory…

And I would be a little more understanding to this situation if I hadn’t already seen her in way too many pics drinking Four Lokos, smoking weed, drinking beer, dry humping on guys, smoking cigarettes etc and so forth! So, I actually think that my real issue with Bobbi Kris is NOT that she’s a druggish whore at 17… but that she’s a fukn idiot for letting people continuously take pics of her doing dumb shyt!!!! That’s the same damn reason why I don’t fuk with Robert Sylverster Kelly anymore either!!!! #stupiddummyheads

Well, I will pray and hope that your parents (but really your grandma Cissy) are able to get you some help for the “non- cocaine” that you “weren’t really sniffing” on film…

AND I’M OUT- Jai

Why I Fux With Charlie Sheen!

Howdy Ya’ll!!!! I wanted you all to be the first to know that I’m on cloud 9 right about now!!! I am soooo in love and it’s amazing that someone could make me feel this way!!! My NEW BOO is the great Carlos Irwin Estevez but most of you may probably just know him as Charlie Sheen! AND he is AWESOME!!!!! I get soooo excited when I see him doing interviews lately because you don’t know if he’s high as a kite OR drunk ass a skunk with the hilariously sad comments he’s been making!?!?!?! I’m sure it’s a combo of both tho!

I haven’t had a celebrity make me feel this great since Whitney asked for the receipts for the crack she bought from the drug dealers knowing good and got damn well that drug dealers don’t give receipts!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA… Where they gonna hold the receipt book at!?!?! BWAHAHAHAHAHA… OR the cash register!?!?!?! Oh dear… it’s too much!!!

Char Char (I call him that cuz he’s my boo) said in an interview with “Today” that he’s tired of pretending that he’s not special!!!! I know that’s right!!!! I’m tired of pretending too cuz I’m fuk’n awesome!!!!! See how my boo just boosted my self esteem!?!?!?! THAT JUST HAPPENED!!!!! You better find a love like ours!!!!

He also said the following when they asked him if he relapsed back into drugs:

“I’m fine. Sometimes I overshoot the mark. But whatever…I just won’t do it. I will not believe that if I do something, then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People that aren’t special. People that don’t have tiger blood or Adonis DNA.”

That’s right bytches, my boo doesn’t have your boring azz normal blood, he has TIGER BLOOD for special people!!!! AND Adonis DNA… he’s a GOD, minions!!!! #takethattakethat

And he’s right! I mean, he IS the highest paid actor on TV earning $1.2 MILLION DOLLAR PER EPISODE on that show that only old people’s watch, Two And A Half Men! I haven’t watched it ever cuz Betty White wasn’t on there but if I knew Charlie was this wonderful, I would’ve BEEN there!!!

He also said in an interview with ABC in reference to his drug use:

“I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it once, you will die,”

Now… ummmmm… I don’t want not near no parts of THAT drug cuz I wanna live and all that jazz but what I WILL be doing is watching his 20/20 interview tomorrow night cuz if I know my boo like I think I know my boo, it’s sure to be a stone cold, rocking good time!!!

AND I’M OUT- Jai